IN the thrilling INDIA-ENGLAND tie, Yuvraj had appealed for an LBW against Ian Bell which was turned down by the umpire. Dhoni went for the referral (UDRS : Umpiring Decisions Really Silly) . Replays were being showed on the big screen. Bell started walking. Indians started celebrating. Crowd started roaring. But the umpires were taking unusually long time to arrive at the decision. Here is the complete transcript of the conversation between third umpire R.Tucker and ground umpire Billy Bowden :
Billy : so what do you think ?
Tucker : am thinking of the Hamburgers. Really miss them billy. They call it ‘wada pav’ here
Billy : yeah, am hungry too. So many 4’s and 6’s .. Tired of dancing again and again. Lets give him OUT and have some rest.
Tucker: it does Look OUT billy . It is hitting the stumps but ..
Billy : but what ?
Tucker : he’s more then 2.5 metres ahead
Billy : WOW ! I thought Only Pakistan bowlers are capable of bowling such a Huge No-Ball .
Tucker : No .. Not the Bowler .. I am talking about the Batsman …
Billy : oh ! .. 2.5 ahead huh !? So what is that supposed to mean ?
Tucker: don’t know .. but it must mean something. Cause the text here showing ‘more then 2.5 meters’ is in BOLD unlike other plain texts.
Billy : so what do we now ?
Tucker : No Idea.
Billy : Get an Idea.
Tucker : I don’t have ICC rule book here with me right now.
Billy : can’t we just leave the decision to the players… like in Sydney Test Match where the umpire once asked Ponting if ganguly could be given out ….Tucker : Can't do that. Ponting is an Australian ! only they enjoy those privileges.
Billy : yeah.. hey … why don’t you ‘Google’ and find out the solution to this '2.5 metre stuff'
Tucker : Great Idea, but I don’t have internet on my VODAFONE … wait .. what’s that … it’s a bird … NO .. it’s a plane .. IS it an Alien … WAIT ! its Vodafone 3G-Man to my rescue ...
Billy : great .. so NOW Browse quickly and select some good search result for this problem. … also ask that puppet-thing why doesn’t he wear clothes
Tucker : hey, I Got it ! .. The rule book says that if the batsmen is more then 2.5 meters ahead, the ground umpires should take the Decision. So, its over to you Billy
Billy : What the hell ? then what is this UDRS for ? I refer it to you .. and then you refer it back to me .. Fine then .. Now I refer it back to you again .
Tucker : and my decision is ‘Going with your Decision’
Billy : Ok .. I say he’s ‘Not Out’ .. C’mon now, press the Green Signal ..
Tucker : Billy, don’t be silly ! look at the crowd.. These people were even ready to be ‘Beaten’ to get a ticket for this match . they will make ‘Tucker Curry’ for their dinner if I give ‘Not Out’.
Billy : then what about me ??
Tucker : I will pray for you.
Billy : You owe me Big Time Tucker
Tucker : I do ! hey look billy… Bell is already bored … he’s walking away
Billy : how dare he ?? I decide if a player goes or not. And I say that ‘He stays’.
Tucker : Sure buddy ! just like you also decide where a fielder should stand, and not the captain ..
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